Sexy Mature Torrie

What are you thankful for? !

You should start thinking about that and counting what blessings you have to be thankful for. You know that holiday is just around the corner, and its a great time to stuff our tummies and remember what we are thankful for. I know I’m thankful for all the hot babes that I can find on a budget. Did you know that 2dollar mature is full of mature ladies that only cost you $2.00 a month to enjoy! Check out 2dollar Mature today!

 

 

Little Johnny was staying with his granny for a few days.
He’d been playing outside with the other kids for a while when he came into the house and asked her, “Granny, what’s that called when 2 people sleep in the same room and one is on top of the other?”
She was a little taken, but she decided to just tell him the truth. “It’s called sexual intercourse, darling”.
Little Johnny just said, “Oh, OK,” and went back outside to play with the other kids.
A few minutes later he came back in and said angrily, “Granny, it isn’t called sexual intercourse.
It’s called “Bunk Beds”. And Jimmy’s mom wants to talk to you.”

The teenager tells her “Loosen up Grams. These are modern times. You got let your rosebuds show!” and out she goes.

The next day the teenager comes downstairs, and the grandmother is sitting here with no top on. The teenager wants to die. She explains to her grandmother that she has friends coming over and that it is just not appropriate…

The grandmother says, “Loosen up, Sweet. If you can show off your rosebuds, then I can display my hanging baskets.”

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NOW THAT SOUNDS LIKE SOMETHING GRAMMA HERE WOULD WANT TO COOK UP AND CHECK OUT!  I AM HEADING OVER TO HAVE A PEEK AT THIS NEW 60+ WEBSITE..  THINK YOU WILL BEAT GRANNY TO THE FINISH?  RACE YOU!

Tt

A flashy showgirl married a 97 year-old retired well-to-do General, largely because she held the belief that the old codger wouldn’t even survive the wedding night.
While her new husband was in the bathroom, the woman slipped into a black see-through nightie and struck her most seductive pose upon the bed. When the old man finally emerged, she was startled to see that he was stark naked except for earplugs, a clothes pin on his nose and a condom.
” Why are you wearing those?” she asked in amazement.
” Because if there’s anything I just can’t stand, “he grumbled, “it’s the sound of a woman screaming and the smell of burning rubber.”

THE SEXY MINKA IS BACK!

Are you ready for all the tricks and treats that come with the holiday? Here is my treat to you!

I can be both the good witch and the naughty bad witch.  Which witch do you like best?   I like being the naughty witch, but its Halloween so you can choose!

 

                 

You can check out even more of me at my own site Torrie.com

 

 

 

Heres to a safe and naughty Halloween
Tt

 

 

Super Market Mistake
This guy is in line at the Super Market when he notices a hot blonde
behind him has just raised her hand and smiled hello to him.

He is stunned that such a hottie would be waving to him, and although
familiar he can’t place where he might know her from, so he says “sorry do you know me?”

She replies “I maybe mistaken, but I thought you might be the father of
one of my children!”

His mind shoots back to the one and only time he has been unfaithful,
” Christ!” he says “are you that stripper at my bachelor party that I had on the pool table in front of all my friends, while your partner whipped me with some wet celery and stuck a cucumber up my ass?”

“No” she replies, “I’m your son’s English Teacher”

A man decides to have a face-lift for his birthday. He spends $5,000 and feels really good about the results. On his way home, he stops at a newsstand and buys a paper.

Before leaving, he says to the sales clerk, “I hope you don’t mind me asking, but how old do you think I am?”

“About 35,” was the reply.

“I’m actually 47,” the man says, feeling really happy.

After that, he goes into McDonalds for lunch and asks the clerk the same question.

The reply is, “Oh, you look about 29″.

“I am actually 47.”

Later, while standing at a bus stop, he asks an old woman the same question.

She replies, “I am 85 years old, and my eyesight is going. But when I was young, there was a sure way of telling a man’s age. If I put my hand down your pants and play with your balls for 10 minutes, I will be able to tell you your exact age.”

As there was no one around, the man thinks, What the hell and lets her slip her hand down his pants.

Ten minutes later, the old lady says, “Okay, it’s done. You are 47.”

Stunned, the man says, “That was brilliant. How did you do that?”

The old lady replies, “I was behind you at McDonalds.”